#rivervale_lodge

"Did you see the mask Dad brought back for Tove? Her mom had made it. It's a treasure, you can see things - like, go places when you dream."

"I asked if you are, not if you should be...." Then she blinks at the change of topic. "I have heard of it, but not seen it myself. I am glad the quest was successful."

"We saw an island full of horses, too. Rescuing them made me very happy."

A bit of a grin. "You have a hero's heart, Dagmar."

Shrug. "I wanna be a hero, yeah."

"You are a hero. You have saved others, multiple times." Truth.

Brow-furrow.

"It's not enough."

A blink. "It was enough for the people and animals you have helped, when they needed you."

"But it's not enough to be a hero."

"Like.. not like you or Kerri or anybody."

A puzzled look. "I do not understand."

"You seek...greater recognition?"

"No."

"No, like..." She frowns.

"I'm never scared of you. Or Kerri."

"Or Dad. Or Tove."

"Scared you'll be disappointed, maybe..."

Brekke, puzzled, listens for her to continue.

"But not, like, ever scared you'd hurt me."

"We have no intention of hurting you," she confirms, still confused.

"I know."

Her brow furrows. "Is there...something that you are afraid of? Something that you fear would hurt you?"

Then the light seems to dawn. "Or...are you afraid that you will hurt others?"

Shrug, looking down as she traces idle patterns on the table.

"Ah." She nods, considering this quietly. "Dagmar...you will hurt others, whether you intend it or not. It is impossible to avoid doing so."

"You do not feel that we hurt you, I think, because you have learned to trust our intent, even when we upset you."

"You're all stupidly honest, yeah."

"I'm just as bad, anymore, most of the time."

An eyebrow. "Then why are you concerned?"

"Because I still get so angry..."

An eyebrow. "You are Gwydion."

She nods.

"So what if I lose it on someone?"

"But I really.. I don't... I feel it and I get away, usually..."

"You will endeavor not to 'lose it'...but if you do, you will do what you can to make it right again."

"Sometimes you can't make things right again."

"No...." A distant look, perhaps a memory.

"You've screwed up big?"

Brekke looks at her, and there's an old pain there...no, several old sorrows.... and they weigh on her.

"Yes."

"How do you... how do you live with it? Seeing all the stuff that's your fault?"

A long pause. "I make right what I can. I learn from my mistakes. I accept the burden, and do honor to it."

A sigh.

"I wanna be like you."

She looks at the girl. "You have caused harm?"

Shrug.

"Dagmar." Firmly. "Have you caused harm?"

She grimaces. "Yeah."

"Do you wish to tell me?"