#rivervale_lodge

Connor wakes up somewhat confused - he's in his own bed, but doesn't remember getting there, and still in his new, borrowed clothing. And he remembers once the sleep fades from groggy eyes the adventure of the day prior, and the disappointment.. and the punishment surely ahead. He eyes the closet, wondering how long he might be able to hide there.

As he sits up, he'll find a note next to him on the pillow: Please come downstairs for breakfast. Kerri's handwriting.

He picks up the note and folds it, slipping it into a pocket - and pauses, finding something there. Connor pulls out a small photograph... and he stares at it for a long time. A woman with long dark hair, fair skin, and expressive eyes - which are downturned to smile at the wrapped bundle in her arms. A hard swallow, and this is slid under his pillow. Straightening his collar, and he steps down the stairs slowly like a man going to the hangman's noose.

Sounds in the kitchen. Kerri-ish sounds.

He reaches the bottom of the stairs, and pauses, fiddling with one of the shiny buttons. Maybe he should change. Turning, he starts back up the stairs, trying to keep his footsteps quiet.

He isn't stopped.

He takes a moment upstairs. Carefully folding the shirt with the silver buttons, the slacks replaced with his normal jeans - in fact, his favorite pair with the sunflower patch on the rump, and a t-shirt. He adds a hoodie sweater from the fall/winter drawer as a final thought, pulling the hood up onto his ears. The belt with the horse-shaped bucket folded up too, and he collects this in a pile to carry down, and gives a small knock on the kitchen door he normally barges through.

"Come in."

Kerri, sounding as if she's in the midst of tasks.

The door cracks and he peers in. "Hearth?"

She's at the sink and looks over her shoulder at him briefly. "Connor. There's cereal and milk, please eat. Would you prefer milk or juice?" There's a bowl and spoon set on the kitchen island and a stool for him to sit on. A couple of different cereals are set out, including his favorites, in their boxes, and a milk-cow to pour from. It's all very much as it ever is. Except...Kerri isn't smiling.

((The milk or juice question obviously referring to what he'd like to drink, not to what he'd like to pour on his cereal.))

"I don't think I'm hungry." He edges over to the table and slides onto a chair, setting the folded clothes in front of him.

"Eat." It's an instruction. "Are those for washing?"

He takes a box of tiger flake cereal and toys with the cardboard flap. "They're for sending north on the next bound sleigh."

"Hearth, does everyone - " He stops, and starts again. "Everyone is-" Another pause. "I shouldn't have gone."

"I'll make sure they're clean before they're sent anywhere. After you eat, the Chieftain expects you to join her for patrol. She is at the stables now." No comment on his other statement. She's busy with kitchen work.

She doesn't sound angry exactly. And she's not being truly cold...but she's also not as warm as usual. Business-like.

A small voice. "Will I see Gerd first?"

"You can see Gerd after. Eat. The Chieftain is waiting."

He makes an attempt, a few dry handfuls of flakes, a sip of juice.

Kerri continues working, starting up a bread dough.

Finally he sets aside the glass. Hesitation, something else he wants to ask, but he doesn't interrupt her work and slips out solemnly to meet his fate.

And to the stables he goes. Brekke is grooming Stormwake, working on his hooves. Judging by the way Star is prancing around, her hooves are already done and she's feeling good about it.

Star prances over to the boy as he approaches, ready to reach down and nuzzle in the guise of checking for apples. A pause as nostrils flaring, and she takes a step back from the boy. A snort, and she retreats, ears flicking uncertainly. Connor, his hand still out for her to snuffle stands there looking confused, and then crestfallen. Even the horse is mad at him. And He turns to face the Chief.

She glances up, noticing he is there. "Connor." Her tone is low, definitely not pleased. She returns to her task until it is done, perhaps another three minutes or so.

He waits.

She finishes, pats Stormwake on the flank, cleans off the tools and puts them away, then exits the paddock. She gathers up Speaker and sets it on her belt. "Come with me," she says as she walks into the treeline on a well-worn path.

He gives Stormwake a glance, but then trails after her, taking several smaller steps to each of her strides to keep up.

Stormwake gives a headbob of fondness to the Chief, then eyes the unruly little one who has been a bad foal.

She does slow her stride enough that he can keep up more easily. It's a minute or two before she speaks, though, and the silence is broken only by the sounds of their steps and the woodsy creatures in the branches.

A couple times his breath catches, audible in the silence of the woods as though he would speak, but after a moment, he exhales, and it passes unsaid...

After a time... "Connor, as best you can, tell me what you did." She does not look at him, and does not slow.

He has to think for a while about how to try to speak clearly, but the best he manages is disjointed statements. "If someone was invited to a, a thing... and they were told they couldn't go... but they decided to go visit them somewhere else... then that's not... no one said that wasn't okay. ...Symon acts his age, so he's allowed to go wherever he wants to. Adam is a good friend, so he gave him a ride... He wanted to see the sidhe. Someone wanted to make sure that things weren't read wrong... and didn't think that... didn't think that..." His head droops. "...didn't think."

"Hm." Several quiet moments. "What does this someone think now, after it is all done?"

"They probably... would probably think that everyone is mad at them. And... that they like that place better than this place. And they should send someone away." His voice chokes up. "He wasn't even THERE." A fat tear runs down his cheek.

She glances down at him at that, but does not stop. A few paces later, she says, "You disobeyed me, Connor. You endangered yourself. You deceived people who have tried to be your friends, and endangered them, as well. Gerd is blaming herself for not looking out for her little brother well enough." A pause. "I am very, very disappointed." He's certainly able to detect the hurt there, as well.

"It seemed like a good idea at the time... A way to make sure he knew... and without going to the thing..."

His miserable tone says he knows clearly that this is not a good explanation.

"It felt like... you didn't care. And it hurt, and..." He struggles with words. "And I... had to do SOMETHING..."

"It seemed like a good idea for you to get what you wanted, without caring for the needs of others. You were happy to fool Adam into driving for eight hours at a time when we are preparing for an important mission. You were happy to put a distraction into our lives when we are trying to focus on rescuing the helpless. It was selfish, Connor. Whatever the reason, it was unspeakably selfish." Oh, she definitely looks angry now.

He hurries ahead and stops in her path, staring up at her with tear-filled eyes. "Then I'm selfish! I'm a bad person! I have Ailil blood and they're ALL BAD and I'm bad and now you know you shouldna never taken me in! And You SHOULD send me away, then I can go be a sour and nasty and learn to trick people better and just never get caught, and then someone will be happy. No more selfish... MUTT to worry about!"

She stops and frowns at him. A deep breath. "Perhaps that would be easier for you, for now. But it would be a lie against yourself. We would not welcome you here if you were truly bad...and this is still your home. So you have a more difficult task to do: you must make amends. You must apologize to Adam for fooling him into exhausting work. You must apologize to Gerd for the worry you caused her. You must apologize to Dagmar, who walked into danger at Gerd's side to find you. You must apologize to Symon for taking his features without permission and misusing them to fool another. After you do all this...as you are an Ember of the Hearth, it will be Dame Kerri's decision of your further consequences. Do you understand?"

He just looks at her for a moment, torn, and then turns and heads back to the lodge, wiping at his face - where he will sob on the bed for a while before trying to decide what he could... or should... do next.

She watches him go for a moment, then sighs and moves to continue her patrol.

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A knock on the door

Dogs bark. Stranger

Kerri comes out of the kitchen and goes to answer the front door, drying her hands on a dishtowel. "Hello?" she says as she opens it.