#rivervale_lodge

"...but not to me."

"Yeah. Like... I can feel them, and I know they're there. When I feel lonely, or adrift, I know I still have..." She trails off. "Yeah, okay, it's not the same for everyone, no."

Rikki's laughter can be heard somewhere. /"Not funny " Jordan grumbles wiping at the markings on his horse parts that depict the choice cuts of meat

"To me.. it's..." She ducks her head a bit. "Like a rope." She rubs at her neck, remembering the raw noose marks on Jonas earlier.

"I don't think Siv or Jonas would want you to feel like that."

"I know that." A touch of misery wavering in her tone now. "And I don't.. like, what if it's like, 'I knocked you up, we'd better get married now? I don't want a bond out of obligation..."

"I think... from another troll? Like, we're not always the most... demonstrative, right? Sometimes oaths are a way of trying to show how important someone is, or what we feel."

Snort.

(Perception plus alertness)

/roll 6

"Yeah, no, Jonas feels more than obligation for you two."

/roll 3

Nothing to see here

Piper glances around, realizing she may have raised her voice a little there. Whew. Nothing to see.

"But then, why now?" She sighs, rubbing at a hornbase. "I don't know. I have to think about it..."

She rubs the back of her neck. "Because, well, big emotions."

"And talking about emotions is hard. So... show it. Make an oath, or do... something? So that you know and are reassured that he cares."

"Lord knows, Siv loves a dramatic gesture."

Indeed, Siv is currently on a tree limb nearby, posed talking to Jonas "No no, ye compare my eyes to start shine then climb up after" A wink

"Why can't I know he cares without a magical bond? Like, it's not less real." Rubbing at an arm. "I do know that."

"Your folks are here, and I am not going to do that" Jonas says "It's rude to them"

Siv sighs

"It's not less real. I'm just... well, trying to figure."

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to ask advice then argue with you about it. I just.. hard to wrap my head around it."

"Oaths are tied into our Dream, tied in deep - they're as much a part of us as music is to you."

"I've been sworn before. Bound. It wasn't a good feeling." Her voice low. "It was released... years ago, now. But I remember. Maybe it's different for trolls. Or maybe it's just me..."

Frown.

"A forced Oath... yeah. There's horror stories about those."

"When you feel trapped, when you can't go against it - all you want is to be free."

"You know I was bound in fealty to Nadeen, once?"

"From a past life."

She thinks. "I knew you had, like.. a fling?" Realizing belatedly that might not be quite the right word.

"No - before I was even Sained. Nadeen took over the body of the girl who had been my foster sister, and I was bound to obey and protect her."

"Oh, that sounds rough. After your own sis was snatched..." Exhaling, a wince.

"All I wanted was to be free of it. I resented her for it. But I couldn't break it - I'm a troll."

"I don't have sibs, only cousins, but I can tell you if someone hurt one of them, protecting and serving would be farthest from my mind."

"Right - so yes, I get it. But I've had good oaths since, ones I took up willingly, with folks who took an oath in return. We're... clasping hands together, it's not a master holding a chain."

Piper shivers visibly. It seems that last comment hit a little close to home.

"Sorry."

"I'll try to see it that way. Like.. I love two trolls. If this is important to them... the least I can do is try to understand, right?" She turns the soda can, half forgotten, around a couple times, fiddling with the tab before taking a sip.

She nods. "And, well, they need to understand you, too."

She nods. "Thanks. It helps to talk about it... like, I have lots of friends, right? But.. not really many close ones. Well, there's Rikki, and I DO talk to her, but I don't always get what she says back, right?"

"PIper!" Siv calls "Jonas won't serenade me"

"Pooka can be tough. Good friends, but tough."

Piper turns and calls over, "Then tell him he can stay here until he does! They have a couch!"

"Sylvi doesn't really get my friendship with Rikki, I don't think. But like... when I talk? She listens. Like REALLY listens. A lot of people, you kinda get the feeling they're just waiting for their turn to say something?"

Dagmar nods. "And it's important to have a friend like that."

JOnas has his face in his hands