#rivervale_lodge

(end side scene)

Later, Dagmar is out by the stables - Stormwake might not understand why the two-legger is in a dour mood as she watches him show off for Star.

Gerd says "You okay? I mean.. I know we're not .. I know we've had trouble, but I still give a damn. And I knwo you love the horse"

Grunt-shrug.

"Whatever. Got too attached. Got soft."

"Stormwake ain't mine."

"You don't have to own an animal to love it. Edwelwiess is my dog in some ways, but not on paper. Oak, isn't... but I'd cry like a baby if he died."

She sucks in her lower lip. "...yeah."

"And you love Stormwake, that's not getting soft. thats.. .,like.. brave. It's cowardly never to care."

Shrug. "Never said I was brave."

"Fff, push comes to shove your'e one of the bravest girls I know."

"Hmph."

"Not about this."

"And yet you care, and you're letting yourself hurt a little... I'd say that's brave. You talk a good game, Dagmar, but you still get hurt... and then you love something again. That's what MAKES you strong."

"And stupid."

"But then, most seelie things are stupid." Eyebrow furrow. "They all count on thinking things are better than they are. Or hoping they are, just... acting like they are, even though... you know?"

"Instead of just taking what you can hold, for sure, and taking today."

A Bite of her lip, "Sounds like you're trying to convince yourself. "

Shrug.

"Can't count on tomorrow."

"Don't like it, but... harder to lie to myself about it right now. Harder to pretend it'll work out."

"Barring the dragon? We totally can"

"Jaymes will be your dad tomorrow, and the tomorrow after that."

"Tove will love you... months from now"

"Years from now, we may lose people, but the line continues, the honor holds if we hold to honor in return, Love can outlast life times, and Beauty is worth fighting for. "

"Trust me. I've got this old jerk in my head who won't shut up and he's like..very wise."

"Love can lose. You can love something, and still be taken away."

"For a time. " She says "But forever? Mmm not so sure about that"

"Honor... that's... that's a lie we tell ourselves, that the world will follow those rules. But it won't. The dragon won't."

Then a sigh "NO.. I have lost. My parents were kinian, not going to come back... but the love is.. I wouldn't undo it if I could."

"Honor is a troll's gift to herself. It's not how the rest of the world fails, it's what we strive for that matters"

"You trying to convince me it's summer?"

"Are you trying to sway me to Winter?"

"No."

"But it is winter, it feels like it."

"My head ain't... like, I know how I was, but I'm not..."

"I don't feel it, okay?"

"Yeah. Okay. Sorry. I just..." A deep breath, "I Need to believe in it right now... honor, love, beauty, justice.... I NEED to believe the dream. "

"We all get by in our own ways I guess"

"Yeah, I guess."

She tightens her grip on the fence rail. "I'm scared of losing everything."

"Probably won't help if I say me too. " SHe says "And I'm a colosal hypocrite."

"Oh?"

"When I lost my folks, Uncle Vali was there, showed up...saved me. Avenged them. Took me to safety. Again and again. But he was always just this uncle.. I told myself. I liked him.. but even as a childling, I didn't let myself see him as taking over for mom and dad, I didn't see how hard he tried to love me and make sure I was loved. He was a good guardian, and more. He would have been more, but I was afraid if I grew to see him like another father.. then I'd lose him too. So I just ... well.. .you know"

"So you kept your distance."

"And now he's moving in with Tiffany."

"Yup. And I'm realizing I've pushed him away" SHe says "You, you were smarter than me. You grabbed onto Jaymes tight. You hold onto Tove. You didn't make it easy for them, but I wish I'd been so brave as to be vulnerable"

"instead. I was.. well... I cheated myself. "

Grunt. "Ain't like he loves you less."

"You sure about that?"