He inhales, and lets it out slowly. "Okay, so, there may have been a slight misunderstanding and confusion on my part."
"The ass part, dear." Bluebell adds.
"Yes, I am the ass. I assumed... well. Bluebell and I, we had our little quarrel. And when I saw that she was headed to the women's clinic, I just... I assumed the worst. I thought that she was going to go... that she was expecting, and due to my stubbornheaded jackassery foolishness, she felt forced to terminate. I mean, that's what those clinics are for-"
Bluebell, "Tsk-"
Julius, "Yes, I know NOW, that they offer an entire suite of women's reproductive health services. But then... this morning, I raced over, and they wouldn't let me in? So I... ahem. I made my own ingress. I was a little... distraught. I will be sure to repay the damages to the door."
Bluebell, "Twas a very naughty door."
Julius, "And went back to find that darling was just there for a test..."
Bluebell, "I never was good at exams..."
Julius, "And the nurse took me for some sort of wildman or protestor and maced me - which upset darling, and she punched the poor fellow..."
Bluebell, "His hands were cold anyways!"
Julius, "...it went a little cockeyed from there."