#rivervale_lodge

Zane walks into the lodge, doesn't even knock. Thoughtful

The dogs greet him, well, Oak does as does Brown Dog. If he thought about it. He might wonder where Edelweiss was? But nope. He sits down at the oversized table, and chooses a high stool so he can look over it, and stares at the fire.

Dag emerges from the kitchen and stops. "Oh, hey Zane."

"Oh" startled, but he smiles, "Hey Dagmar"

"What's up?" She joins him at the table - he might now notice her stack of homework.

"Oh, I'm learning what I want, and realizing it's way bigger than I ever imagined," He says

"Yeah? That's good, right?"

"Yeah, but now that I know what I want, what my passion is, I just lost a lot of excuses to get out of working for it." he says "No more slacking. You see my problem?"

"You want to slack?"

"I mean, it feels good to work and see results. Like... practicing and seeing yourself get better. A year ago, I couldn't even ride a horse!"

"It's been the one thing I'm good at ,slacking I mean," then he looks at her, smiles, "That is a very troll ish answer yo uknow? But I'm glad you found horses. I know they like you."

"But, like, if you really like what you're doing, I think it doesn't feel that much like work?"

"I suppose it doesn't" he says with a smile, "thanks, Dagmar. That makes me think part of me is holding onto the laziness I cheerish. How are things for you?"

She considers. "Pretty good, relatively. Better."

"Better is better," he nods "Sorry if you were feeling down. I guess I've not been much of a friend to you girls , it's just, well, Nadeen and I, I don't want her feeling I'm stalker guy?"

"You two should talk. I.. like, I know she pushed you away pretty hard, because.. like, she was trying to get set up for some funky political marriage. I suspect she said some mean things?"

"But I don't think she meant them, just... uhg. You know? She still likes you."

"Thanks, but , I don't know. Much as I gripe about being sterotyped as a satyr, I AM one and I worry sometime I might...well, if she wants me alone and me to have her alone I worry I'd be unfaithful with the ..well, you know, sex, and hurt her. Satyrs bodies and hearts don't connect the same way, nor our brains. Honest to gosh, i'd feel better if she had another lover and then iwouldn't feel bad about hving my own."

Dag considers, brow furrowed. "Well, you two should talk."

"I mean, you made her happy. And Varich don't do the One True Love thing..."

"I'd like her to be happy."

"I suppose" Then he says "You know, if you're into her yourself, I don't mind. You're good to her. Seriously, when you came here, you were a bit of a mess, but then, you had reasons? And... push come to shove, you're not just a muscle maid, you give a damn, and you're smarter than folks give you credit for. And you have a big heart. Nadeen is lucky to have you as a friend, and she's said so. If you wanted more, maybe you should try?"

She blushes and shrugs. "Dunno."

"I don't think dating is for me. But.. I.. I mean.. like.. Nadeen is... like.. I want her to be happy. To be with someone who makes her happy."

"Hey, Dating is... well, you know it comes at different times in folks lives. I bet you'll find the right time for you, but whoever you date is going to have to respect the duty part of your life as you are really dedicated to what yo usee as your duty. Not everyone can agree to make room to share someoene with Duty, but that doesn't make you bad or wrong .. different strokes. I just was thinking Nadeen and you...well, when i was a bogan and YOU two were satyrs. You remember?" A cough "It wasn't me you were into. I know that much."

BLUSH.

"I mean, satyrs are kinda... I mean..."

"I'm a troll now."

"Right, but that just means you won't be as open about your feelings, not that you don't have feelings for someone"

"Sorry, I'm not trying to shove you towards her, just.. you know, you give me good advice, I'm trying to return the favor"

"Yeah, but I'm not... I mean..."

"I just wanna be normal."

"By whose standards? My dad wants me to be a brain case academic like him in the same areas. My mom think I could be a better musician like piper if I really tried. Normal... for a satyr. I guess? But.. what's normal depends a lot on who you ask, and what parto f the country you're in in what century. I think normal is something folks fake more than they really are. It's cameflague"

Shrug. Frown.

"Sorry" he notices the frown, "So, is it me, or are you and gerd getting along better?"

"Kinda?"

"Cool." he nods "I thought you two didn't like each other, but glad it's .. you know, patching. Like my dad says, "Contented Lords in Blue? The Barony faces problems few""

"Well, she wanted... she..." A frown. "I don't wanna say anything mean."

"It's cool, I'm not trying to dig into... " A pause "Well, I guess I AM digging into your biz. Sorry. I just , well, lately I've felt left out of the group, part of that is my fault. "

"You've been busy?"

"And.. I dunno. I dunno why things are better, but they are?"

"Maybe she stopped trying to make me her big sister. I can't.. I can't be that, or do that, I don't think."

"I have, and so have you gusy, just different circles. Glad they're better. And... yeah, you can't force folks into roles , just, invite them to try the shoes on." He looks down at his hooves "Not that shoes are my thing. " A grin then "oh, Lydia loves those little Buddy's Buddies your dad is selling."

"...Lydia?"

"My little sister, Kinain." he says "Not sure you've actually met her, just seen her at events"

"Oh! I have seen her, I haven't met her proper."

"Not sure how I feel about COnnor spending so much dog time.. but it IS good for him to get out."

"I'll have to introduce you" he says "She's all right. And..mm Well, Connor doesn't have much choice right? I mean, if he wants to get out side of the lodge, he has to either avoid all mortals or meet them as Buddy. It sucks for him. I see why Gerd feels protective of him"

"Yeah. There ought to be a better treasure to hide him."

"Well Chicanery helps." A pondering "Elder form might, but both tend to wear off"