Long view; character development. She was seduced, she had Zara, she was happy... she was taken. YEARS of enslavement, then suddenly freed. Burning vengeance, and a LOT of emotional baggage about being a mom, not being a mom, not stepping on Hannah, then Togail and GRUMP and still unresolved baggage dragging behind her.... being with/near Zara DOES hurt, because what's lost can't be recovered. Off the Dreaming, for VENGEANCE. Years dedicated to THAT... it was good to see the Tower burn but it wasn't Paler. Somewhere that's 'home' for Zara, time with her, yes.... good but... she hasn't fixed the PROBLEM that is Paler, and ... if Zara knew her, knew her well, she'd be... flawed in Zara's eyes.
Distant, Miriam is perfect in Zara's eyes.
Hard for a nocker to want to screw that up.