#bergen_county

Time being a wibbly wobbly thing may make no sense in Bergen, but in the words of an ancient sage when asked if this was a problem : 'Fergit about it'

This IS however, Sam's chance to visit the older kittens. No, she does not WANT a kitten. She has Oski who in a past life was Odin, but she might appreciate the chance to VISIT the kittens before they are taken by others.

Also Dirk, for some reason, texted her asking if she could come over but didn't give many details

Her only response was a texted "OMW"

Perhaps she was on patrol, perhaps she was already out, but she is there in under 20.

"Damn" Dirk says when he opens the door to let her in "That was quick. Come in. Far as i know it's just us and the cats in the house so this is where I'm supposed to offer you a drink or some shit"

"I think we got a Dr. Pepper in the fridge because symon and mom insisted we keep a few just in case"

"Anyway I wanted to ask your advice cause you're good with animals and most of them just look edible to me, and because you tolerate people were I just wanna smack em"

"...Okay?" Brow, patience.

He gets her a dr pepper, not bothering to deal with that she hasn't asked. But he gets a drink for himself too, then says "Okay. I got FOUR Kittens, and loads of idiots WANT one. Normally I like having this kind of power over people, you know us caps. But I want them to have good homes or Scrot will never forgive me. Y'know?" He rambles on "Some folks are willing to PAY for the kittens. Which is nuts but there you go right? Not a lot, like 30 bucks a pop. And they're not all assholes, but I..." A scowl "I kind of want to give one to Serenity because she's already got a favorite and she's making these BIG eyes and me and shit. She would be good to it, I know, but if I DO that, folks are gonna talk shit about how it's because I LIKE her or something. Symon is too hard to find right now for me or I'd ask him, but how do I give her one without folks getting in my face and acting like it's something romantic? I mean, she and I aren't even banging so ..." A beat then he remembers who he is talking to "Not that everyone needs to bang to be romantic I guess. I'm just saying MY style of romance involves banging. "

This maybe more than she wanted to hear, but there's a reason Redcaps aren't masters of social interaction beyond bullying.

"Simple, you say you are sending the cats to the best homes."

"So - not first come first serve, but, y'know, based on compatibility. The kitten picked her. Not your fault."

"I mean, is there an objectively better place for that particular kitten?"

He thinks it over "There are folks who could give the kitten more toys, or stuff, but... my cat's favorite toys are boxes we're trying to throw away and a three year old ribbon on a yule gift from years ago. She ignored the gift, loved the box and that damn ribbon. Cats " A snort "Anyway, you got a point. It's not even much of a lie to say she's a good pick for the kitten and I blame it on the kitten and boom, I'm off the hook!" He realizes "Pretty sneaky, there Dags" Approvingly

"I mean, y'know what they say about trolls." A grin.

"You're too damned tall?" He asks, half joking

"Well, that too." The smile stays.

"oK, what's the other thing?"

"Why, that there's nothing like troll subterfuge!"

He snorts a laugh up!

Her eyes crinkle up at the corners.

"you got me there... and what am I even worried about the cash folks are offering... I'm a cap, not a nocker bartering. If I want cash I'll do it the old fashioned way, I'll bully them into giving it to me while the kittens pick their people anyway" A nod happy to be back in his groove, "oh, Congrats on CJ finding himself"

"Right? Makes things easier. Not that we'd love him any less, but... easier."

"And he gets to know who he really is way younger than I did."

"No offense, HE grew up in a good family, you didn't so that's probably a big help on why he broke out early. You been through some shit, Dags, and you know it. " He drinks his own beverage then says "But if it helps, if anyone tries to make shit for your fam while you're gone? I'll snap the Sons of Bitches in half. " A pause "Course, it's a bit under cut by the fact your dad can lightning strike sons of bitches and your mom can set them on FIRE, but the offer's on the table" He concedes "But yeah, him being a troll means less work around needed for the right of ignorance as he grows up from now on. Connor will probably keep an eye on him when he's in town for ya too"

"Well, pretty sure by some convoluted system, Ceej is your kid brother by proxy."

"Shit, ANOTHER mouth to feed? No wonder I'm always hungry"

"HA."

"But that makes him part of your turf, so it ain't sentiment or nuthin'."

"That's true enough... " He nods "I'm the damned Peacekeeper here, which means folks don't fuck around on my turf, and keep the peace, or I MAKE pieces of em" He isn't trying to scare her, but he does look scary without meaning to. "Yeah, anyone hurt CJ around me better be ready to scream" And... gwydion's boon, he means it.

A nod. She knows.

"Damn, I almost envy you going to alaska though" Wistful?

"Oh?"

"Oh geez think about it, Dags... some redcaps believe we were dreamed up in the ice age, with howling hunger and want... but whether that's what happened or not, there are some SERIOUSLY bad ass legends up there. Wendigo flesh eaters, 'things' under the ice that will come up lilke a fucking polar bear devouring Kraken, spirits of winter and land both stomping around as big as your brother's pokemon. Sure, ALaska isn't always covered in ice, but the dreams of it? TEEMING with Narnian White Queens, Winter Wargs, and shit.. I don't know, probably a Thunder Moose on a rampage. You are NOT going to be bored with so much to fight "

"True that."

"Hey, if you kill a wendigo or a winter warg, can you keep some of the fangs for me? I'll add it to my tooth collection"

"Sure. They got more'n one - Sy might like body parts, too?"

"But I will try to save you a cool tooth."

"Thanks! You'd have to ask Sy about his preferences but yeah, his taxidermy skills would love that. Don't tell im I said so but some of his weird creations weird even ME out. Do you know he connected three different animal skeletons once and tried to make it look natural?? I forget why. Could have just been fucking around with the biology department at Rutgers"

"Art. Symon's an artist." A soft, fond tone.

"I guess if Cronenberg was, so is Symon" He concedes " I really don't know he does it. The imagination, AND the deftness... it's like flesh and bone jenga with him only it never falls. No wonder Dad hopes he takes up surgery. Symon would be good at it. Like, hearing heart beats even when faint, and lacing stitches up like an old southern lady with 50 years of needlepoint"

"Sy would be good at whatever he set his mind to." She shrugs. "But yeah. Good hands."

"You know... If you're looking for a gift he might like... " And Dirk tells her of stuff he saw Symon looking over a few days ago. Obviously, DIRK can't get that for him, it would make him look soft, but a girlfriend might use the info...

(Fade to talk)