#bergen_county

"you're an asshole!"

"No, YOU'RE An Asshole!"

"No, I'm a bitch, Asshole is gender specific!" PRissy shouts back

"Girls can be assholes too!" Dirk snaps "Ask the Rover! He says women can be anything!"

"Oh yeah? Well, for a guy you're a bit of a PUSSY!"

"I got Patrol!" He yells "I'm the PEACEKEEPER!"

"You're WHIPPED!"

"You don't care that I'm whipped, you just care I'm not whipped by YOU" Dirk snaps back

"I... asshole!" She shouts back

Dirk says 'Not that I'm admitting to being whipped by trolls or .. shit. I'm out of here!" And he storms off

"JERK!" Prissy snarls and destroys somethings. Not Symon's things. She learned her lesson there

And then, once Dirk is out of earshot, and at least three things are destroyed, Prissy begins to cry.

Aw, shit. Symon thinks. Maybe if I wait a while, she'll quit it or go away.
...
...
Why is she still blubbering? Over -DIRK-?

Finally Symon slinks out of wherever he was secreted away. He can be silent as a shadow when he wants, but this time he makes sure to shut a door loudly as he approaches, giving Prissy a bit of warning that she's not alone.

A snifflinngg.. then the door sound and tthe sound of snot beingg sucked back into a nostril

And the tears are stopped "Who is it?" Growly

Anne Marie is actually working at the office. And the Doctor is, no surprise, at the hospital

"Just me. I, uh, needed to get a book I left in there."

"GAWD!" She swings the door open "What is it with you and reading?" She does move to the side. Oh wow. She is puffed up like a goldfish in a microwave. Sure, she's stopped the tears, but she's not fooling anyone that she hasn't been crying

"What's with you and all the yelling? What did Dirk do this time?"

"Besides the fact he either can't count or has to kiss blue ass over everything else? NUTHIN" She snaps at Symon

"We're in Rivervale. No one lives here for long without getting a taste of it." He says, bluntly. "That's the trade off. But what do you mean about counting? I have it on good authority he can get up to at least 20... if he takes off his shoes."

"How is this your bussiness? Are you his math teacher or somethin?" She snorts "But yeah sure, if he had 31 fingers and toes he'd remember!"

Prissy started boinking Dirk 'for sex' and maybe for a sense of power and security. thatt's all it was if you asked her. But then, that was started... wait, 31 counts ? Calenders... hey, wait, they've been 'dating' for like 3 months!

"Did he forget your birthday or something?"

"No.. yes! Not my birthday! we just... you know what you don't even like girls so you wouldn't understand"

Symon is almost offended - but the redcap isn't wrong. "Yeah, yeah. I don't understand. You wanna explain it to me like I was a doofus? Maybe the stupidity runs in the family."

"No, Dirk hogs all the Stupid for himself" she snorts "It's our ANNIVERSERY.. 3 months since he took me out instead of us just banging"

As if Dirk should realize the purely physical relationship took on more meaning at that EXACT moment, and should have marked it

A bit of a blank look. "Is a three month anniversary a thing? I didn't know that. Did Dirk know that? I bet if he did, he'd have sacrificed a goat or something for you."

"Yeah sure..." She sighs "A blood sacrifice WOULD be sweet though. He's supposed to KNOW this shit because. well... it's his fault"

"What's his fault? I mean, he does a lot of shit, no one can keep track, so you gotta be more specific."

"I just wanted SEX" She says "You bang a guy, get him on the hook, and you've got an edge! Long as you might be able ot b eat him in a fight, right? HE's hte one who took me out... and asked what i like! he knows my favorite color.. because he ASKED? What guy asks? He ruined EVERYTHING by... he made us like this! it's his fault"

"Sounds like it backfired. Maybe Dirk's not that dumb after all. You thought he was on your hook, but he's the one who hooked you."

There's and clack sound.. holy shit, is she unhinginnng her jaw ? She gazes at him "GET OUT!" and she snaps the air in front of him, way too close!

A cap's ability to terrify is.. impresive

He scrambles back, and hisses quickly, "I'm just saying! You gotta turn this around again and get back on top!" Regretting his word choice even as the mental image comes... vividly. "This is your chance to get the better of him and keep him off guard! He doesn't realize it should be a special day... er, thing? Surprise HIM with it, and you have the advantage again."

"FIVE..." She's counting down. Crap. She's not even using fingers.. "FOUR!"

"Fine, whatever. Do what you want." Serves him right for trying to help, and he scuttles out rather than waiting for the countdown.

"Three.. " And.. oh shit. more tears..

he's gone, he's casper, but.. damn his sluagh hearing

A crucial warning. Good thing he's above those bloominng Seelie urges. Like how, it would be nice if Prissy and Dirk actually did find happiness in each other.. .true love, you know? And how he'll always admire how Dagmar tries to stay true to her values.. the honor there is .. wow, tangible. Why even the Chief tries to do right by him, and she tries to repay her debts evenn to a whispering kid. He should do something nice for them maybe

Damnit! And despite his better instincts, he heads out, seeking assistance from... hmmm. Symon ponders this for a bit, then heads to the butcher shop. And then heads to a different butcher shop, until he finds one of the more ethnic-leaning ones that doesn't shy away from whole animals.

Mr Undabi happy to help! "Hey, I know you, you buy that spine from me.. how that work out for you?"

"It was great." He smiles at the butcher. The shop is clean enough, it passes health inspection, but something about the smell of stale blood and flesh that can never really be fully aired out is pleasant.

"I was wondering if you had any whole animals. Like, a baby goat, or lamb or something."

"Hey, you in luck," he says "Man was going to have lamb to celebrate his son graduatinng college. His son say 'I am graduated, I am also gay' father say 'you are not gay' son kiss boyfriend in front of father. Father disown son, son flip off father. Order for Lamb cancelled. You want take look?"

"Sounds, uh, perfect?"

And out comes the whole lamb "Not even chopped yet. Barely shaved ... hahahaha"

Bit of an oddball, Mr. Undabi

Symon looks it over, and grins a bit. "How much? Or rather, how much for your favorite shopper? No one else comes and buys up all the odds and ends as often as I do..."