#bergen_county

Kerri doesn't introduce Bluebell, as she's not sure the pooka wants to be noticed much. "Well, let me know if there's anything I can do to help out," Kerri says.

At the mention of the strip club, an ear raises a bit. "A dancer?" Curious.

And she takes the seat opposite Bluebell.

Well, then... "Leya, Bluebell. Bluebell, Leya."

"Oh yes.. strip tease" the satyress says "I'll get that order for you both. Would you like some coffee cake? I'm supposed to offer it with a soft push"

"Oh, why not. Helps you look good for the manager, too, right?" A grin.

"I am sure we shall both be disappointed by the coffeecake, though not the service. Alas, we will struggle through."

A chuckle. "One does what one must."

"So it is said." Again, that unhappy expression.

"Thank you, Leya," Kerri says. And after the server departs, Kerri says gently, "Are you fairly certain? Or is it only a worry?" It's clear she's referring to the pregnancy test.

She starts to answer, then pauses, and murmurs a fairly convoluted response. "I worry for the answer to a question I had not asked, and the answer I know sought in the heart of one I thought held mine own heart as his own. I fear the answer, for what the answer will bring."

Leya is very grateful and off like a shot, leavinng the two to talk

Kerri listens and nods. "I think that's the way with a lot of answers. Some, though, have heavier impact than others." She sighs. "Well...I suppose I could obtain another test -- there's a drugstore two doors down -- and you could use the restroom here...." A suggestion, adding, "It might be better if you find out while you're with company, rather than alone."

She hangs her head. "Shall I blame it on my nature that I am filled with fear? A hawk soars overhead."

Kerri rests a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Trust me, I've been there. Wait here for me. Tell Leya I'll be right back...and maybe you and she could talk a bit." She rises and is off on her new errand.

"Tested once, told it knows what is true. Twice, only the faintest blue? Thrice, will be what I already knew? If you look upon a lottery ticket enough times, will the numbers change?" She stares into the table, and as Kerri steps away, rests her head on her arms.

Kerri pauses. "Oh. You've already..." She sits back down. "Well, probably better to confirm with something more certain...." She thinks. "I might have an idea. If you'll allow me."

Leya comes back with their drinks, andn slice of cake 'Enjoy"

She peers up at Kerri curiously.

A smile to Leya, "Thank you." And then more serious as they're left alone again. "I could try Whispering you. Find out what your body knows that your brain isn't sure of."

"Once I know, I have to decide. Do I go with where my heart goes, or who my heart holds? Oh, WHY is he such a fool? More the fool am I." Her chin trembles a bit and she hides it behind her coffee cup.

Indeed, Leya took the hint most professionally

Kerri touches her arm. "Once you know, you know what decisions actually lie before you. But I won't insist." A pause as she sips her drink and has a bit of the tolerable coffee cake. "Tell me about him?"

"When he looks at me, it is like I am the sun that rises and fills his eyes. Neither a singer nor a poet, yet he speaks to me in heart-song and soul's verse. And yet, and yet. He does not listen, or cannot understand. Is it a woman, or a rabbit, that confuses him? I cannot comprehend. There is room for only one in his heart, which gave me great joy, until the possibility came that one becomes more."

A quiet moment, then she says, "I suspect that being pooka might add further difficulties in communicating, which can already be tricky in a relationship."

"Does he know that this situation is...not merely hypothetical?"

She shakes her head. "Of course." Perhaps a touch guilty looking. "Though it is not as though I haven't tried. Miss Hearth, he bought me a pet, to soothe my nesting instincts. Oh! The Female condition! A lady's hysteria! I could not speak further."

Her ears droop now, and she whispers, scandalized. "Someone may have slapped him." Her cheeks redden.

"Ooooh," Kerri winces at the mention of the pet. "Well, he sounds like a bit of a numbskull, doesn't he. He may have earned that slap."

"Lady.... Dame." She corrects. "You who have bourne a bridge of thy own, a fine and sturdy one. Didst thou always know you were meant as a Pontif?" Using what Kerri may or may not recognize, the older meaning of the word, a bridge-builder.

"A...pope? Ah...I'm not quite following you there. But yes, Sylvi's my daughter, and thank you for the compliment to her." She sips her drink as she puzzles through how a pope got into the conversation.

Bluebell's lips purse a bit, frustrated, and she sips her coffee.

"Do you mean...did I always know I would eventually have a baby?" she asks slowly, parsing out the earlier part of the question.

She brightens a touch, and nods. "Was she in your heart, and mind, before your arms?"

"Even before thy stomach?"

"Well...I don't think it's quite fair to compare our situations. I mean...no, for the longest time, I was not expecting to have a child. I mean, when I was much younger, I couldn't imagine wanting that burden. And when Olgar and I started seeing each other..." a pause and a grin before she continues "...well, we both had our duties -- mine to the Lodge, and his to the trods. We were lovers when our schedules happened to meet. And it was wonderfully fun." She sips her coffee and thinks before continuing.

"No, the sense that being a mom was something that I wanted came much later." Another grin, and she shakes her head. "Poor Olgar. I told him, more or less, that I wanted to have a child, and he was welcome to be part of the process, but that if he wasn't interested I would find another way."

Her eyes widen. "Oh! Such a thing to say. And his retort?"

"Well, we weren't oathed, then, you see. And we hadn't even spoken about being oathed. Things were fine between us...except my body and brain had decided this next step was going to be part of my life. He...well...we had some words, and he left for a while. That wasn't unusual, though. He was away more than he was present in those days."

She swirls her mug idly. "But when next he came back, he said he was all in. That if this was something I wanted, he wanted it to be with him." She looks at the pooka. "He's done many brave things in his life, but I think that might have been one of the moments that terrified him most, up to that point."

"I'm not sure what happened while he was away."

"My Julius. If he is yet mine to claim, with no oath, and only a ring of promise. He has never been one to claim the title of brave or bold... And yet, he is sweet, and kind. If he were to leave? I am not as strong as you, even were I to wake up Blue." She wipes at her eyes.

"We're different. That's why it's not a fair comparison. But you have different strengths. Does he know what kind of man you believe him to be?"

She shrugs expressively. "If you had asked me a week, a month, a year ago? Perhaps? But now I cannot guess what he believes." A sigh. "I must speak with him. Somehow. I will try."

"Yes. And, I think, you must also listen?"

She sits back a bit, ears going up, and a hand to her chest. "I? I am all ears!"

She raises a brow. "Did you slap him with your ears?"

She covers her mouth, and shakes her head. Chastened.

Kerri relents and grins gently. "Olgar definitely got slapped once by me, too. But I recommend keeping your hands out of range this time."

Her noses twitches a bit, but she manages a tiny smile. "Perhaps. If I meet him as Bai, and not Bluebell. So oft do we dance within the light of the fire, and part for chores... perhaps we must speak in the cold, that my voice can be crisp and clear."